Homosexual Tendencies
by freezy queen
Summary: 'Tori is not gay. She is not. Just because she occasionally admires Jade's excellent boobs does not mean she has any romantic feelings for her.' / Tori has a rather.. awkward conversation with the guidance counsellor.


_I'd like to give credit to the lovely _**_LackingLucidity_**_ for allowing me to write this after she came up with the idea. She's written an amazing Cade fic (No One Understands), and I definitely recommend you read it if you're a fan of Cat and Jade and you'd like to see a different side to their relationship._

_Remember to read and review!_

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Tori bounces up and down on her toes as she scans the corridors. She's not completely positive on who or what she's looking for, but she's been put under strict instructions not to let _anyone_ into the gym by Andre and a very hyper Cat, and she's listened. It hasn't been too hard so far - only the occasional student with a hallpass has seen Tori, and none have questioned why she looks as though she's going to pee her sister's brand new designer jeans that she may have borrowed without permission. Maybe drinking four cans of lemonade was a bad idea, but what were they expecting when her stake-out position was so cleverly positioned next to a vending machine that sells incredibly cheap drinks thanks to a very generous sponsor of Hollywood Arts?

Just as she's about to leave to go to the bathroom (because, oh my God, her bladder is _screaming_ at her, and it's so full it hurts), Tori sees a familiar face stroll past with an armful of papers and a blue plastic lunchbox in hand.

"Hey, Tori." Lane says, watching her bounce up and down with interest, "You okay, there?"

"I'm fine!" she calls, trying to stop squirming but failing. Now she looks as though she's got a bad case of wobbly legs.

Lane looks confused.

"You sure?" he asks, in a way that seems very guidance counsellor-y; a side of him she doesn't normally see when he's wandering around offering chip-flavour lotion to students. This really isn't very good for the girl who can't lie even when her bladder isn't about to burst like a balloon.

"Positive!" Tori replies, too quickly, wishing he would hurry up and leave because there's a bathroom with her name on it down the hallway that she really needs to get too.

"Great." Lane says slowly, as though he doesn't believe her, but he doesn't press the matter. He steps forward. "Anyway, I need to get to the-"

"No!" she screams suddenly, covering the doors with her arms spread out wide like some kind of madman. A passing teacher gives her an amused look from behind Lane.

"Tori, are you okay?" he asks again, looking worried. "Would you like to come to my office and talk?"

Tori realises that he isn't likely to leave until she tells him what's wrong, but blabbing about how much she needs to go to the toilet is probably a bad idea that would have to be explained even more. So, instead, she chooses to find a way out.

"Um, yeah, sure. Please! Okay. Yeah, sure, please." comes out all in one breath, as she does her fidgety dance. It seems like a way to make him go away, and there must be a bathroom nearby that she pay a visit too.

Lane nods, still watching her strangely.

"Okay. Follow me, Tori."

As instructed, Tori follows him to his office. It's a corridor away from the gym, but third period is only twenty minutes through and there can't be any others who want to get into the gym (aside from the gym teacher, and Jade took care of that one). She takes a seat as he does the same, and accepts some lotion as she looks around the office and tries not to empty her bladder's contents all over the red fabric.

She's been in the room multiple times before, but never actually for_ advice_ (unless you count an unmentionable incident a few years ago involving some apparent 'anger issues'). It's always been something stupid or completely random; helping out other teachers, needing to ask Lane something, or being involved in a injury-mystery case and having to give evidence (they never did find out who did it..). But now, she actually has to act like she needs help. Tori's not exactly positive on all the details, but she knows that she has to distract Lane to prevent him from leaving his office.

"So, what's wrong, Tori?" Lane begins, and Tori's mind goes blank. She's got good grades, good friends, the lead role in an upcoming play, and her parents probably aren't going to get divorced. What does she need help for.. aside from a bathroom?

"Um, Lane, I, um, I think I might, um.. um.. y'know-"

"Is this about Jade?"

That sentence momentarily distracts Tori from her extreme need to pee.

"What?" she asks, stunned. She and Jade still aren't friends exactly, but they're on the best terms at the current point in time that they ever have been.

"You and Jade." Lane says, leaning forward in his seat. "Tori, I know these things are scary, and different, and it may be hard for you to say it to another person if you've never spoken about it before, but you won't be judged here. I can just sit and listen, if that's what you'd like."

"W-what?" Tori repeats, confused.

"Tori, being gay is not a bad thing. You don't need to be scared of what other people will think about you. You're a performer - just act! Lesbian relationships are becoming more and more open these days, and you have a great group of friends whom I'm sure will support you with whatever sexual orientation you find you are-"

"Sexual orientation?!"

"Yes, sexual orientation." Lane frowns. "That is what you wanted to talk to me about, isn't it, Tori? Your feelings for Jade?"

Tori has to stop herself from letting her mouth hang open. _Oh my God_, she thinks, _Lane thinks I'm a lesbian_. Sure, she's kissed a girl, but that for a play, and it didn't mean anything. She had a date afterwards, with a _boy_, and she felt far more sparks when she kissed him than when her lips collided with Cat's. Besides, _Jade_? Even if she was gay - which she _isn't_ - why would she fall in love with Jade? She hates Tori, and she's been verbal about it for the whole time that they've known each other. Oh, and there's the small matter of Jade's _boyfriend_.

"I'm not.. I-I'm not.. Lane, I'm not in love with Jade." she stutters out.

Lane shakes his head.

"Tori, look: I know coming out is scary, and I understand that you're worried that Jade won't reciprocate your feelings, but you'll never know if you don't _try_!"

"Lane, look, I don't.. I'm not.. I don't love Jade! I just need a wazz!"

The guidance counsellor sighs, and leans back in his chair.

"Tori, your feelings won't change, even if you deny them as strongly as you are now. I've seen the way you look at Jade, as have many of the staff members. Sikowitz has even commented on your apparent obsession with her chest. We all know how you feel."

Tori is not gay. She is not. Just because she occasionally admires Jade's _excellent_ boobs does not mean she has any romantic or sexual feelings for the other girl. It does not.

"Anyway, Tori, coming out may be a good thing. I think Jade may just feel the same way." Lane does a strange wink gesture that comes across more creepy than anything. "I've seen her checking you out a few times."

Tori is caught between being freaked out by Lane's behaviour and the news that Jade may have 'checked her out'. It's Jade, after all, and it's not like she's very open with anything at all, especially to _Tori_ of all people. But, no, she isn't gay, and this whole conversation is just weird. Then Tori's bladder reminds her about those four sodas, and the fact that she was meant to be guarding the gym, and she really wants to leave.

"Look, Lane, I think I better go. I have, um, _things_ to do."

He sighs.

"Okay, Tori, if you must. Just remember, being gay is not a bad thing."

"I'm not gay!" she tries to insist, but Lane just shakes his head and Tori takes that as an indication to leave. She gives a small wave to Lane, out of politeness more than anything, and closes the door behind her as she leaves. Tori leans against it and lets out a whine.

"Oh my God, I'm gay." she moans, sliding down the door, and rubbing her forehead.

"So," comes a voice a few feet away, and she sees a smirking Jade leaning against the wall outside of Lane's office. "I hear you're gay?"

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_Thanks for reading, and remember to review!_


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